KISS JOKES

☻A peach is a peach.a plum is a plum.a kiss aint a kiss unless its wiv tongues.so open ur mouth & close ur eyes & give ur tongue some exercise

☻Kissing you baby is my dream.Im the strawberry & ur the cream.Handle me gently keep me real keen.U & i together babes is passion so extreme!

After a few days, the Lord called to Adam and said, "It is time for you and Eve to begin the process of populating the earth so I want you to kiss her."

Adam answered, "Yes Lord, but what is a kiss?" So the Lord gave a brief description to Adam who took Eve by the hand and took her to a nearby bush. A few minutes later, Adam emerged and said, "Thank you Lord, that Was enjoyable."

And the Lord replied, "Yes Adam, I thought you might enjoy that and now I'd like you to caress Eve." And Adam said, "What is a caress'? So the Lord again gave Adam a brief description and Adam went behind the bush with Eve.

Quite a few minutes later, Adam returned, smiling, and said, "Lord, that was even better than the kiss." And the Lord said, "You've done well, Adam. And now I want you to make love to Eve." And Adam asked, "What is 'make love' Lord?"' So the Lord again gave Adam directions and Adam went again to Eve behind the bush, but this time he reappeared in two seconds.

And Adam said, "Lord, what is a headache?"

Professors of different subjects define the same word in different ways:

One kiss we share
Could tell me you care,
A peck on the cheek
Of promises could speak
A brush of your lips
Makes my heart flip
What words cannot say
A simple kiss can convey.
 

☻wot kisses mean!KISS ON HAND=i adore u KISS ON CHEEK=lets b friends KISS ON NECK=i want u KISS ON LIPS=i luv u KISS ANYWHERE ELSE=...lets not get carried away!

☻Kisses blown r kisses wasted.kisses rnt kisses unless they r tasted.kisses spread germs and germs r hated.but u can kiss me baby im vaccinated

A kiss is a few bits of love compiled into a byte. - Prof. of Computer Science
A kiss is two divided by nothing. - Prof. of Algebra
A kiss is the shortest distance between two straight lines. - Prof. of Geometry
A kiss is the contraction of mouth due to the expansion of the heart. - Prof. of Physics
A kiss is the reaction of the interaction between two hearts. - Prof. of Chemistry
A kiss is the interchange of unisexual salivary bacteria. - Prof. of Zoology
A kiss is the juxtaposition of two orbicular ors muscles in the state of contraction. - Prof. of Physiology
A kiss is infectious and antiseptic. - Prof. of Dentistry
A kiss is a credit because it is profitable when returned. - Prof. of Accountancy
A kiss is that thing for which the demand is higher than the supply. - Prof. of Economics
A kiss is an event whose probability depends on the vital statistics of 36-24-36. - Prof. of Statistics
A kiss is the persecution for the child, ecstasy for the youth and homage for the old. - Prof. of Philosophy
Uh, What? I'm not familiar with that term. - Prof. of Engineering
A kiss is a noun that is used as a conjunction; it is more common than proper; it is spoken in the plural and it is applicable to all. - Prof. of English

THE 5 STEPS TO SUCCESS
Want to make her keep coming back for more ??
Well you turned to the right place for help!

Your date has been exceptionally great. All through the date you have received subtle hints to take that one step to let the hearts merge through the lips. And boy oh boy! Do you want to follow that lead or what?

Don't know if you kiss great? If you are a success at working up the chemistry that makes every kiss feel so great? Would she want to go on a date with you again and wish that it ended once more one a kiss and more?

Slay your doubts and read on, you are just about to let your babe experience the mind-blowing kiss she has otherwise just heard and read of!

The first and the most important step is to test the grounds you are venturing into. Lean close to her, bordering just those couple of inches away form the kissing paradise, both of you have been conjuring in your minds. And if her attention does not seem to deviate from your lips, go guy go!
Moisten your lips with a casual flick of your tongue over them. Be careful that you don't make it look sleazy and obscene.
Brush your lips casually over hers. Attention: Avoid any other form of body contact at this point.
If you find her eyes closing in response. now is the right time to deepen you kiss. Open your lips inviting a sensuous exploration. Remember this your first date, allow her to take control so that you know what is really expected of you!
Encourage her, by pulling her ever so slightly closer. Return a kiss for a kiss, a caress for a caress.
.. And you are on the right path from here on! Where the date leads to from here on is entirely your doing!

What a kiss could convey.
"When words become superficial, humans make use of kisses" - Sigmund Freud